IfYouGiveAMindensenABlog

As most of you know, I am a part of a two-year discipleship program at camp, and I just finished my first year. (This blog is a part of the ‘assignments’ for the program…the monthly newsletter part) I started this program really excited…admittedly nervous, but still excited because I KNEW this is where God wanted me to be, and I KNEW He was going to do GREAT things. However, going into this 2nd year, I have not been as excited. It was a REALLY good year, and God did do A LOT of things. I grew, I changed, I was challenged, I got to witness other people grow, learn and change, but I was tired. I didn’t WANT to be here anymore. The ‘novelty’ of it had run out. It was hard work. It’s tough learning to live and work, do life, and fight spiritual battles with people. Great things happen, but there are plenty of NOT SO GREAT things…However (obviously), I didn’t back out. I had made a commitment for two years, and I knew that I was supposed to stick to it. I thought about my boyfriend, and how God brought us together. How I was really excited…and admittedly nervous, to start out on this new path, but I KNEW God was leading us, and KNEW (know) that God was going to do (is doing) GREAT things…however, I also know that there will come a time when the emotions/the excitement/ the ‘novelty’ will wear-off/go-away. We will face tough times, however, just because I will no longer “FEEL” the same way I did when I made the commitment doesn’t mean I should break the commitment. The reasons for making it don’t change, just the emotions. So, if I wouldn’t drop my boyfriend just because I wasn’t ‘excited’ to be in the relationship anymore or because it ‘got tough’…why would I drop out of the program?

I’m SO thankful that I stayed, because already God has been rebuilding that excitement in me, and has already been teaching me SO much. I LOVE the study we’re doing on Apologetics, and the new people who joined have been really great. It’s going to be another tough year, but it’s going to be another GREAT year of growth, learning, and change.

God is GOOD! ♥

“Dance with me-oh Lover of my soul- to the song of all songs. Romance me-oh Lover of my soul,-to the song of all songs.” Lyrics, mere words to song, but is that really all they are? I’m not exactly sure which worship song they are SUPPOSED to belong with, but for me they have been an addition to the song ‘How He Loves’ **Random interjection: This song came up on ‘shuffle’ while I was writing this blog ^^ ** Have you really ever thought about how God romances us? I mean, everybody talks about how the church is the ‘bride of Christ’, and how a man is supposed to love his wife, like Christ loves the church…but what does that really look like?

For most of my life, I have been single, but I’ve wanted God to romance me… I knew/KNOW that He held/holds…protected and PROTECTS my heart, but it’s only now, as I’m barely in the beginning stages of my first ‘romance’ that God has really been able to reveal HIS ‘romantic’ side in a more personal and REAL way.

My boyfriend and I have a long distance relationship. We met at camp, and spent most of the summer around each other, but this Fall we find ourselves separated by just a ‘few miles’ and a couple of hours; me still at camp and him near Detroit. It’s tough, and there are a lot of times when I really wish that he could be here sharing in some moment/event/ whatever…However, what I’m learning to do is invite God into those moments, and not just to talk. I mean, it’s good to pray to God, and I DO talk to Him about my life and things that are going on, and it IS good to thank and praise Him for who He is and for what He has done, but it’s been AWESOME just letting Him come and BE with me; letting God fill my need for companionship. There are plenty of times when my boyfriend and I will just be hanging out, and we won’t do anything. We just rest and enjoy BEING together…and that’s what I’m learning to do with God. And, you know what? In the long run, it’s more satisfying. What I’m learning more and more is that the things of this world really do NOT give us what we need. God is the ONLY One who can really satisfy. Memories of moments I’ve spent with my boyfriend often bring up a desire to be in that same moment…to repeat it. It hurts sometimes to remember that he is NOT here. However, remembering moments with God are still just as satisfying because God is still JUST AS PRESENT NOW as He was THEN. The moment doesn’t serve as a reminder of the distance, but as a reminder of His Nearness ^^ … Now, here is my disclaimer: It’s not bad to miss people or to look back and remember special moments, you just want to be careful and remember that it is GOD who truly satisfies our need for companionship and who REALLY keeps us from being alone. If we start depending on other people to fill us, we’re only going to end up worse off. People can NOT always be there, and WILL not always be there. They’ll make mistakes, and they WILL disappoint and hurt us…that’s life. God, however, will ALWAYS be there, and will ALWAYS love us.

God is GOOD! ♥

Well...once again, I've come to the end of another month, and the close of another summer at Bair Lake Bible Camp. The blog I posted right before this one kind of gives a long 'summary' of what God's been teaching me/what's been on my mind, but I didn't say anything about the actual events of my month so I figured I should probably right another one doing so.

The first half of August went by in a blurr of end of the summer camp. It ended with two camps being on the same week. Fun, fun, fun for AV. However, I made BOTH movies,a summer-summary video for staff, and STILL got 4 hours of sleep. WIN! So it took all summer, but hey...it still makes me happy. Now all I have to do is finish writing the Manual. :) Yes, that's right, I am now working on writing an AV Summer Manual. Complete with diagrams ^^ It should be good, and hopefully VERY informative/helpful for future AV workers.

Now that the summer camps are over, summer staff has pretty much ALL left **tear(s)**, but with the end of summer comes the start of retreat season and GUEST GROUPS! We hit the ground running, with a full-week long guest group,followed by back-to-back (some slightly over-lapping) groups...whew! We've kept busy doing turn-overs, making sure each new group has a clean place to stay :)

The biggest change that's coming is four more people will be joining the discipleship group. I'm very excited because I KNOW God is going to use Outfitters to do GREAT things in these peoples lives. Housing, will be interesting, but I'm trusting God to work all that out. Yes, I'll be honest, I'm not SUPER-EXCITED about sharing our little apartment with two more girls, but God's given me a peace about it, and like I said, I KNOW they're here for a reason :)

On a HIGH note, starting on August 25th (and actually Aug.24th after work!) We 1-year Outfitters were given some vacation time that doesn't end till the new Outfitters move in on September 1st. It's only 1 week, but still, I'm thankful. I got to spend the first half in the Detroit-area with my boyfriend and his family. It was my first time visiting them, and Detroit. It was a lot of fun, and I already miss him (long-distance relationships kind of suck, but hey! God got us this far...), but than I was able to take the Amtrak (another new experience) back home to IL to spend the 2nd half of my vacation at home with the fam. It's been GREAT. I've been able to chill, and just spend quality time with my family who I don't see all that often. I was even able to watch my younger brother's (I can't say little b/c he is now taller and more musclely than me ^^ ) first soccer game of the season. He's a senior and on the varsity team. I feel SO old. I don't really no anyone on the guys' team anymore, and I used to be the manager. Oh well. Such is life...

and that catches me up to today! =D

God is GOOD! ♥

“I have come that they may have life and have it to the full” (John 10:10b) Jesus is saying that through HIM there is life to be lived; a life that is FULL and good. In Jeremiah 29:11 God promises to have a plan for OUR lives; one that is not harmful but prosperous and hopeful. But how do we get this FULL life?

Well, first off, you HAVE to have Jesus. Jesus is the one who is speaking in John 10, but also later in John he says, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”(J14.6) Jesus is saying He is the ONLY way to life, there is NO OTHER option. However, once you have accepted Jesus as Lord that is NOT the end. Christianity isn’t a just another ‘religion’ it is a LIFESTYLE. In Matthew, Jesus says, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” (M16:24) However, this also, in and of itself, is not the key to having a FULL life. If one just focused on ‘living’ the ‘good Christian life’, they could easily become legalistic, and lose out on the JOY of living in the FREEDOM that comes from living with God. “Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is FREEDOM” (2 Corinthians 3:17). That’s where I’m at…kind of.

I know I’m not perfect…in fact I lived in almost perpetual regret and fear of people finding out the faults I KNOW I have. So, I tried to set boundaries, make standards, live ‘inside the lines’ so to speak, in order to insure as few mistakes, failures, and embarrassments as possible. However, living that way, keeps me from really being able to live. A part of life is taking those RISKS, making MISTAKES, that’s how we learn and discover new things. God didn’t save us in order for us to live in a box for the rest of our ‘redeemed’ life. He came to FREE us, and give us an ABUNDANT life.

Also, as I’ve been thinking about it, I realized that my placing myself ‘in a box’ is actually rather arrogant of me, and ultimately shows a lack of trust in God, and His ability to guide and protect me. By limiting myself to some basic “dos and don’ts”, I miss out on the variety of opportunities God wants to open up to me. As I was telling someone the other day, life isn’t all Black and White. Good things don’t all come in singular packages. Some of you have already heard my ‘Garden of Eden’ Theory: Some things God specifically labels as bad, but God generally gives us choices and simply takes pleasure in us making good choices. For the most part, I have been working off that theory…for ‘bigger’ decisions. However, for the day-to-day living, I have not. I’ve been living like God is some big overlord just waiting for me to screw-up so He can punish me. Often times I feel ‘trapped’ into obedience and completely drained of energy and enthusiasm, facing two dismal options: displeasing God or misery. Well, I was miserable, but I was determined to be a ‘good little soldier’. So I’d put my smile on, and did what I thought needed to be done. Needless to say, that’s not the abundant life Jesus was talking about, and despite what I thought, my misery wasn’t really glorifying to God either. “…the Fruit of Spirit is…JOY” (Galatians5:22a). Going back to John, Jesus says in Chapter 15 “This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples” (J15:8). Yes, He does also say a chapter earlier “if you love me, you will obey what I command” (J14:15), but Jesus isn’t looking for mindless following, He’s looking for people who LOVE; love God, love others, and LOVE THEMSELVES. Yes, there is the famous passage about the Greatest Commandment (Matthew 22:37-40), and the multiple passages about putting others first (“The first shall be last” Matthew 19:30) and dying to self (ex: Galatians 2:20). However, I think we as Christians lose sight of the fact that our ‘joy’ isn’t all about heaven. Yes, our hope is in what Jesus did for us and there being a perfect place to go when we die, but that’s not all there is…if so, KILL ME NOW!

Fortunately, that’s not how it’s supposed to be, I agree with the Psalmist when he says, “I am still confident in this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living” (P27:13). Yes, the world is corrupted, and has been since The Fall back in Genesis chapter 3. However, in the two preceding chapters, readers will find a whole description of the way life was supposed to be, and in a sense, can still be WITH CHRIST. When Christ comes into a person’s life, He doesn’t ‘just’ save them, He makes them NEW. “If anyone is in Christ, he is a NEW creation. The old has gone, the NEW has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17). We’re made NEW, and no longer have to live under the bondage of the law. For centuries the Jewish nation lived under a strict set of laws, and rules that are all found in the Old Testament. When Jesus came, He fulfilled the law, paid the penalty, and opened the door to us being able to live FREE; free from the power of sin, death, and the devil. Call me a radical, but free to follow our hearts because they’re no longer deceitful and wicked, free to dream bigger than we EVER thought possible and then STILL have God blow our minds because He is able to “immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine”(Ephesians 3:20)…which is one of my FAVORITE verses by the way. We have a God for whom “nothing is impossible” (Luke 1:37), who’s fruits are “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control”(Galatians 5:22-23), who made the universe and everything in it (Genesis 1&2). Why live a life that doesn’t reflect God’s great and AWESOMENESS (Nehemiah 4:14a.5ish ) ? We don’t need rules, we need JESUS!

To close, “Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy, the devil, is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (2Peter 5:8), and the devil likes to play us into the extremes; in this case: legalistic versus recklessness. Don’t let “freedom” be your excuse for doing something foolish, but don’t let legalism stop you from doing something GREAT! Ecclesiastes states, “The man who fears God will avoid all extremes” (E7:18b), so relax, trust God, and if you have any doubts ASK. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the PEACE of God which transcends ALL understand will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4: 6&7). I want to be a woman of PEACE, and who’s filled with JOY. I’d like my epitaph to read, ‘A woman filled with the Holy Spirit, and whose life was characterized by Its FRUIT’. What do you want yours to say? Does your life now reflect it?


God is GOOD! ♥

Yep, once again another month has flown by. My verse for the month/the summer Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
That verse and reference are taped rather conspicuously on the wall of my office. Camp is going great, and I haven't had anymore disasters like my first week. There are still it's down times, and stressful times, but overall I'm doing GREAT! However, it is so easy to start worrying about, or getting anxious about things that we have no control over. We need to do what we've been called to do, and let God handle the rest. We can't control other people, the weather, or technology. Only God is All-powerful, and that's a REALLY GOOD thing. He does things so much better than I ever could. He expands my dreams and hopes farther than my own imagination. I thank Him for daily providing, being ever trust-worthy, and for being there ALWAYS. Rest assured, no matter what happens, what's going on, how you feel, He IS THERE, and loves you, and wants the give you a life that is full and abundant.

God is GOOD!

Four weeks of a year comparatively are not much, but many significant things can still happen in such a short amount of time. In my last newsletter, I kind of introduced June when I was talking about my birthday, but now June is gone, and I’m starting day three of July. Oh, dear…hold on, because my birthday seems like it happened FOREVER ago.

First off, summer here at camp officially started this month. Four days after my birthday the summer staff started working. We have over 20 college-ish age people (AKA my age people) working as paid staff this summer. It’s been nice, and kind of crazy at the same time to have more of my peers around camp outside of Outfitters.
With summer, my job as AV Director also officially started. As I type this, I’m currently waiting for my 2nd week’s summary video to generate. It’s been kind of a long couple of weeks AV-wise, but I understand that starting a new system means putting in some extra work at the beginning. So, that’s what I’m doing. It’s been a process to figure out what works best, and what is the most efficient way to go about making the summary videos.

Lastly, but MOST importantly, what has God been teaching me over the last 4 weeks? Praise Jesus, Many, MANY things. It’s amazing how much my views on things can change, and how God really does control the heart. This past month, I’ve continued to learn more about love. What it is, what it looks like. One main lesson was the concept of really loving someone like a brother, when they aren’t. Being able to acknowledge it, and accept it. I know I'm being vague, but much of what I've been learning this month has been rather abstract and it is hard for me do adequately verbalize it at this current time in writing. I'd LOVE to talk about it though. God has been doing GREAT things, in my life, at camp, and in the lives of the people around me, and I KNOW He is going to continue to do so. All praise to "Him who is able to immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us." (Ephesians 4:20) That's probably my favorite verse, and I come back to it a lot. I'm so thankful for a God who goes beyond anything I could dream of, I pray that He continues to expand my hopes and dreams, but still, I'll NEVER be able to fully understand God's true essence. PRAISE HIM!

God is GOOD! ♥

Yep...it is now a new month. Time for me to talk about the events of May. Well, it's been kind of crazy (as slightly anticipated, probably a little more than originally expected, but...) First off, Camp's Men's Retreat was the last day in April-the first weekend in May. I did AV. It was definitely a learning experience AV-wise, but it was also really cool to witness such a powerful weekend, where I really believe Men's lives were changed. The next weekend, My brother graduated, and I got to go home for that, and I got to spend time with my mother(as it was conveniently Mothers' Day weekend as well!) . It was AWESOME. The next weekend I co-hosted, and then left with my fellow Outfitters and other Bair Lake staff (including all of our mentors) for a road-trip to the Creation Museum. It was a lot of fun. We stayed at a local Christian camp Sunday night (in tepees!), and then spent all of Monday at the Museum. It was really cool to walk through a museum that didn't date things to MILLIONS of years, and to hear(and see) the Gospel message preached at the end! Plus I touched a llama =D THREE llamas actually ^^ Anyways, continuing on, at the end of that week, I had two friends come in Thursday-Saturday to help me organize camp's AV (Audio-Visual) department. I'm SO grateful to both of them for all of their help. I could not have done what we did without them. Side-note: For the summer, my job is going to be AV Director, which has caused it's own stresses and lessons. All-in-all, I know it's going to be a GREAT summer. Lastly, this past weekend (Memorial Day weekend) I was able to go home again (and bring one of my fellow Outfitters with me) in order to go camping. For the last 3 years, my family has been going to Shades Park (near Turkey Run in IN) to camp with 3 other families that we don't get to see very much outside of Memorial weekend. It was a lot of fun. There is usually VERY little organization of activities and it's mostly one BIG chill weekend, with a bunch of God-fearing, fun-loving people. It's DEFINITELY one of the highlights of my YEAR!

So today is also my birthday. Yes, I'm 20 today. I have now been alive for 2 decades. With time, the months seem to get shorter and shorter, and May was no different. Today, as I reflect back on May, as I reflect back to my 19th birthday, as I reflect back through the last 2 decades, one thing stands out; clear evidence of God working in my life.

If you have been following my blog, you know that the last few months have not been 'easy', but neither has some other parts of my life, but that's life. We live in an imperfect world, with imperfect people. I'M NOT PERFECT. I'm going to make mistakes, so are the people around me. The only 'person' I can really trust to NEVER fail me is God. That's what I've been learning. That's really what God has been saying all these years.
Life is going to have it's trials and hardships, but in those times are we relying on ourselves, the people around us, or are we relying on the All-powerful, All-knowing, Ever-present God, who created ALL THINGS?

I have set the Lord always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Psalms 16:8

The theme for May was humility, and God certainly started lessons on day one. In many different areas of my life, God has been showing me that I FIRST need to humble myself to HIM, and place whatever the thing is at HIS feet first, and trust HIM with it, but then to also humble myself to the people around me, and to trust what GOD is doing in their lives, and what HE is teaching them. My first priority is to listen to and follow what God is specifically directing me to do, the 2nd is to listen and follow the people who God puts over me.
May has been a month of laughter, a month of tears, a time of trials, a time of learning, a time of growth, a time of change and tradition, transitions, busyness, relaxation, RANDOMNESS! But what month hasn't? What month doesn't go by without a variety of emotions being felt, and random things experienced, obstacles faced, and lessons learned?
In the end, as I look back on life it ALL comes back to Ecclesiastes. "There is a time for everything..."(E3:1), but are you going to stop at "Everything is meaningless" (E1:2) or will you recognize that with GOD ALL things have meaning (Colossians 1:15-20)?

God is GOOD! ♥